Back to Life, Back to Reality

Is the song stuck in your head now? My apologies, but you’re not alone- I’ve been singing it in mine for about an hour.

Well people, it’s official: I’m back in the states and totally unemployed. When you first think of not having a job, it sounds appealing- no alarm, no assignments, no one to answer to. It’s kind of like a vacation that never ends. Except no one tells you that your ticket to paradise can quickly become a ticket to hell when it’s always for a party of one.

tom hanks

Though I may have more than just a volleyball by my side, boredom still seems to take me down quicker than the undertow. As I drown in a relentless job search day after day, I start to question why I went to college in the first place. Hear me out- I went to school, to get a job, to pay for school. With all the debt I currently owe, and a Bachelor’s that apparently is getting me nowhere, I’m forced to find a reason for spending four years on a degree. Now I’m not bashing education, and like all the posters in elementary school read, “knowledge is power.” But when living in a world where it’s who you know, not what you know, what’s the point? And let’s be honest, I don’t care if you went to Harvard or Coastal Carolina, a generous amount of students spent their time at school drowning too- in alcohol.

old school final

Just to be clear, I’m not playing the innocent card here… Blue was my boy too.

But let’s focus on what a young girl like me should do in this situation. I’ve already taken all my savings and traveled (if you follow my blog that’s pretty obvious) and now I’m broke, living in a realm full of no’s wondering why I’m trying so hard to jump on a 9-5 carousel that’s clearly making everybody else vomit due to motion sickness. Decisions, decisions.

Though I may be better off than Dory, what ever happened to the phrase, “there are plenty of fish in the sea”? It feels more like a perpetual darkness than a bright ocean full of opportunity to me. Sorry if that sounds pessimistic, I can assure you I’m more of an optimist, I just wasn’t aware that graduation meant that I’ve unknowingly boarded the Titanic, or as others call it, the real world.

titanic

I’ll end my rant now, concluding with the fact that none of us know what the hell we’re doing. Though I may have led you astray down a path of negativity in the previous paragraphs, my main intention was to help you realize that, just like the song stuck in your head, someone else is dealing with it too. I’m not sure what my future holds, but who does? You can try and blame it on the past, get sucked into the dissatisfaction of the present, or doubt the future, but you can never deny the process. Hence this post and the last GIF above- if you just go with it, it’ll come to you. I know I’m unemployed, but that’s a temporary fact which will change in time- when it’s meant to.

One thought on “Back to Life, Back to Reality

  1. I believe in YOU, a wonderful and creative writer! And I am proud of your accomplishments.
    I love Dory and you are as steadfast! Continue to believe🙂

    Like

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